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I never told you that I was made of thread

so I cannot blame

every word out of your mouth that unstitches me

but there have been holes in the lining of my heart

for awhile now

I make do by patching them

with whatever you can spare to give

a bruise

a laugh

but most often now your eyes

I have feared eyes my entire life

but I’m beginning to trust yours

you love them most when they’re yellow

but it’s only when they’re green that you can be bothered with me

and before you whispered in my ear

four silent years

then a whisper

the very whisper that echoed through cathedrals

uprooted  sequoias

and flooded the Arizona desert

I simply thought your eyes were brown

and it was when they matched the whiskey stain on your collar

that your tongue broke an unspoken promise

your voice swam into my ear

and built a home where she could grow

she still grows

and when she begins to ask questions

I will not be silent

I will not lie

you never understood why a liar like myself

would tattoo “I must not tell lies” on the back of her hand

there is a reason

that I will never be able to express without breaking that promise

the very one you shattered

you were right to say

that I should not have been surprised

the position your twisted bed sheets has landed us

but you are wrong to think a piece of plastic could have prevented this

it was out of your control

I’m sorry

I don’t long for your guilt

anymore than you crave mine

we were both born in the ocean

and we managed to build a fire

I want you to know

you taught me a lesson

and whatever you may think about that

I’m thankful

you don’t have to assume anymore

I’m finding other reasons to sing

- Damon Diehr

 Do not mistake comfort for happiness. 
theboredomkillingbusiness.tumblr.com

I don’t know how you make me love you

I really don’t

I’m cold

I’m harsh

I’m often cruel

And yet you have made me adore you

desire you

laugh with you

run away from you

I want to give you weeping willow

for many reasons

partly because I don’t know what to give 

but mostly because once its planted

it will be hard for you to leave it

so far it hasn’t been hard for you to leave me

I am patient

but I’m also trying to be silent

the silence is what’s hard

to give you a willow would be to yell

I must be silent

so I guess there’s nothing to give

Healthy Habits to Increase

  • Drink water as often as possible
  • Sleep enough, but never too much
  • Rise early with the day (this is more than merely being awake)
  • Meditate daily even if it is only 1 minute of purpose
  • Practice yoga 
  • Breathe
  • Smile
  • Stand and sit with spine properly aligned 
  • When a negative thought enters the mind, speak and hear “ohm”
  • Spend less time looking at a screen (blasphemy)
  • Listen to your body and love yourself

It took 13 days

for the marks you left

to fade

but I still remember

their shape

I’ve been a coward

and I don’t want to be any longer

I need to say this to you

while looking into your eyes

please let me finish

before you chose to speak if you wish

I’m in love with you

I always will be

and you have no reason to feel guilty

for not feeling the same way

because in a different world

in a different time

or just a different place

we are incurably happy

together

and if here and now

I’m the only one in love

that’s okay

not great

but more than enough

as long as you let me do what I can

I’m sorry

maybe cowardice has it’s reasons

so I’ll only say it the once

you make me love myself

as a kinder person

a more loving person

a happier person

you have lifted me, and I will never forget

but if you ever let me 

if you ever let me

who knows what I would be able to lift

I don’t know why I’ve never been able to put this into words, til this day

it’s simple really

people make me nervous

(Source: theboredomkillingbusiness)

Prepare yourself tumblr

I’ve used tumblr mainly as source to kill boredom and to help others kill boredom while once in a blue moon voice my opinion and/or educate. It’s become very monotonous and it’s about to change. I, Damon Diehr will now SHOUT the words I believe and come from the self; Point out underrated flaws and beauties that I see happening within myself, my community, and this world; Share music, books, quotes, teachings, and opportunities that have evolved my soul; And lastly have a completely open space for healthy discussion or heated debate if you persist. It’s official if your down, I am game. A few points that I need to make, and of course I’m ready to go into further detail if necessary. 

1. Fuck cops. They are not trying to protect you they are trying to meet a very low standard to create an illusion of safety and pay their bills.

2. Women are equal to men, but have yet to be treated as such. Men are not more intelligent than women or superior to them. We live in a society that claims the problem is fixed because women can vote, but until all sexes can walk around with no shirt in this fucking ridiculously hot weather legally and without being objectified you can not claim that the united states encourages a progressive feminist culture. I’m not even going to touch upon other countries, many are fucked.

3. There are more than two sexes and there are more than two sexual orientations, and all of them must be granted their right to marry whoever the fuck they love. 

4. 9/11 WAS A INSIDE JOB!!! (That is only the tip of the iceberg) The real terrorists are the ones that leave you in a perpetual state of fear, the MEDIA and the corporations that fund them.

5. Fucking read books, watch documentaries, download everything you can free from the internet and start educating yourself NOW! 

6. Go outside. Get out of the city. Get lost in the woods. Put down your iphone. Destroy your television. Play an instrument. Make art. Work. Do things with your hands. Meditate. THINK. 

7. RESIST. Question everything. 

This has been a sufficiently long post, but this is only the beginning of one beginning. To the followers that enjoy the pretty pictures I post, don’t fret I will still post aesthetically pleasing bullshit in between what really counts. If you have questions, suggestions, or in need of resources I am here and all ears. 

(Source: theboredomkillingbusiness)

 You once said to break my heart, “You’ll be the last to leave”. Well look, how smart. 

(Source: theboredomkillingbusiness)

Sparrow

I saw a sparrow today

A sparrow landed into my view on a branch above my grasp,

I began to reach for him not caring he was to high up.

His wings opened in protest

I drew my hand back,

But still the damage was done and he flew away

Leaving me to my pain

(Source: theboredomkillingbusiness)

Reasons I know my mom loves me

1. She made vegetarian stuffing even though I cook for myself because she knows it’s my favorite

2. She has not once told me to be quiet when I sing and play guitar extremely loud between the hours of 9pm and 4 in the morning, even though our bedrooms are right next to each other

3. We completed the FAFSA today even though neither of us had started our taxes yet, she went ahead and did the work (for both of us) to get the info we needed

4. She hasn’t said a negative word about me deciding to go to a school that’s 100,000 dollars out of my budget and she’s willing to co sign loans for me 

5. She tells me to have a good day at work every day even though I’ve never been awake early enough to tell her the same

6. She let’s me stay cooped up in my room and push her away even though in the past we we’re terribly close because she knows I need to now but not forever

7. She let’s me sleep in obscenely late even though she’s bored in the afternoon all by herself

8. She’s always let me be myself even if she didn’t like who that was and she always understood or pretended to

9. I’ve seen her wear the shirt I bought her for Christmas five times already

10. She imagines a better future for me than I even imagine for myself

The Boredom Killing Business: Bookstore

theboredomkillingbusiness:

One day

A day that is probably far away

Someone will fall in love with me in a bookstore

They’ll watch me dance walk to the music playing and follow my steps to the vegetarian section then to the local, drama, and then finally to the poetry where I will plant my bottom in the middle of the…

Bruise

You’re not the only one whose hiding a bruise

You’re not the only one, yes I still got something to lose

Count down the days

Maybe I’ll be safe

Grab chance by the throat

Cause after this who knows

These fantasies don’t interest me

I’m trying to grow up please

Perfectly content to be a puzzle piece

Things aren’t meant to be perfect for me

What will you look like

How will you say my name

Will I be glad that you’re here

Or mad that you were away

I was so sure of my direction

But now that you’ll be close

Let’s see where the magnet

On this compass goes

Say goodbye to the idea of rivers and roads

Three thousand miles closer

This healing is slow

You’re not the only one yes I still got something to lose

Yes I would call you my permanent bruise

Will I be glad that you’re here

Or mad that you were away

-Damon Diehr

(Source: )